WANNA ACTIVATE ABUNDANT TREASURES WHERE YOU LIVE?
If so, you have the #1 trait of a wonder neighbor. Trait #2 is not needing to feel more ready than you do right now to start.
The most valuable treasures are hidden in plain sight:
Neighbors with many gifts of the head, hands & heart.
Wonder Neighbors is about learning to discover, connect and excite those gifts and other community resources. While there isn’t a “right” way of doing this, we started the journey by talking with neighbors. Here’s what we know for sure and have learned thus far:
All neighbors have gifts to give.
But our actions may not always reflect this. If / when we deem a neighbor as too young, old, ill or whatever to include in a discovery conversation, we show ourselves grace and start over.
“Neighbor” is as much about kindness as closeness.
“Neighbor” means more than a person living nearby. It also means “a person who shows kindliness or helpfulness toward others.” So a neighbor could equally be a blood relative or cashier at a store.
Nature is our most life-giving neighbor.
Depending on how we look at it, we could say we ARE nature. But the bottom line is that people don’t thrive when cooped up inside, disconnected from the treasures of fresh air, sunshine and greenery.
We’re learning to use our gifts to connect neighbors to neighbors and to parks, local businesses, clubs and more to create conditions for—to spark—well-being to happen.
If you’d love to do that in your community, consider our invitation:
(NO SPECIAL QUALIFICATIONS REQUIRED.)
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Tell us your yays! or uh ohs to help other wonder neighbors excel.
I wonder how my father would have fared with a wonder neighbor or two.
Hi, I’m Dr. Mary-Elizabeth Harmon, creator of Wonder Neighbors. My smile doesn’t match that intro, but fits with the end of this story…
My father had many gifts, skills and interests. Sadly, these went largely unnoticed and untapped as he got older, though his impulse to contribute never waned. In his 80s, his efforts to volunteer around town fell flat, and activities he knew of in his neighborhood weren’t his thing. So he spend long hours in his basement office reading books with as many equations as words. As a man who was always up for a party, the isolation was particularly bad for him. And after a young death in my family, it seemed that he slowly gave up. My father died of dementia at age 90, and I can’t help but wonder if his neighbors—or I—could have helped him live longer and healthier by buffering his grief by engaging his gifts.
But Dad wouldn’t want me to feel guilty about that. Though he might say to you, “Be a wonder neighbor and do better than my lousy daughter!” 🙂
QUESTIONS:
Mary-E, I want to be a wonder neighbor but feel nervous. Your thoughts?
There’s a teaching in Jewish mysticism: Discomfort is light—new awareness—trying to be revealed. Without new awareness, our behaviors and outcomes stay the same. Feeling nervous is a price we pay for the ability to transform our communities and lives.
OK, but do think my neighbors will want to have discovery conversations?
I’ve found that neighbors are eager to connect but are waiting for someone else to make the first move. Strike up a conversation about anything and see how it goes. Whether you get a warm or icy reception, remain open to engaging folks when they’re ready, if ever.
What exactly do I say?!
This is where Wonder Neighbor Mail and Zooms can help: I’ll share questions and conversation starters I try on my journey as a wonder neighbor. And if you and others join me on Zoom, which I hope you will, we can talk through different approaches together.
Mary-E, are you sure I’m qualified for this?
If you have a desire to help your community come alive, you’re qualified. In fact, feeling a bit unqualified could be good: it might help you have conversations in a humble way that helps others to see that they can become wonder neighbors too.
Why are wonder neighbors important when professional community builders exist?
Professionals can’t create community connection—that’s up to us and it’s a must for our health. Also, without community connection, we run a greater risk of outside folks swooping into our neighborhoods and bringing their visions to life, not ours.