Inspiring wonderful places to grow up and grow old by fostering care communities and care economies for & by neighbors.
A trip for red lentils pushed me to learn to drive at age 36: Then a new resident of Georgia, it once took me 3+ hours to get to and from Whole Foods on MARTA (Metropolitan Atlanta “not so” Rapid Transit Authority) and once was enough. But I was a lucky one because even though…Continue reading How ice cream cones (or red lentils) can help you plan your future
Until my mother and I started chatting last summer with a woman at Los Tios Grill, I’d only known of Jimmy Buffett, who died recently, as a singer, not the proprietor of retirement communities inspired by his music and lifestyle. But the woman, a self-described “parrothead” (diehard Buffett fan), said that she was visiting from…Continue reading Margaritaville escapism, vertical village engagism or something else?
As a daughter, my mother is my mother. As a family caregiver, my mother is my customer / client: she gets services from me. As a village maker, neighbors are my primary customers. Or people who’ll “buy into” caring for folks nearby. The idea for Vertical Village Alliance grew directly from my childhood as an…Continue reading Making what’s missing to serve your “customers”
I told a friend that I’m ditching the phrase “care crisis,” which I picked up from someone else in the first place. That isn’t to say that all is well in the world of care, but that problems and solutions can’t occupy our brains at the same time. When we call something a crisis, we…Continue reading Care crisis or prosperity opportunities?
It was obvious once I heard it but, to my embarrassment, it hadn’t occurred to me before: When Black people were fighting to sit at the front of the bus, people with disabilities were fighting to get on the damned things. Fast forward many years from my “how didn’t I see that?” moment ’til now….Continue reading Working until death: a fate for many with disabilities
There’s a saying that goes, “If you want to take the island, burn the boats.” Attributed to different people, it means “if you’re determined to advance, eliminate your means of retreat.” Like when I quit my job vs. taking a sick leave of absence: the latter would have let me return easily if the going…Continue reading Making a minimum viable village
“Sarah” wondered if I might have advice to help her help a friend, “Grace.” While getting the background, I discovered that Grace is a “solo ager,” a term used to describe an adult, or couple, aging without the support of children or other close relatives. Grace hadn’t been picking up her phone following a recent…Continue reading 5 wishes, 2 solo agers and a lockbox
My friend put his face close to mine looking eager for an answer to his question: “How did you get your parents to leave their house?” he wanted to know. Sadly, my answer didn’t help him much because my father’s doctor literally ordered him out of my parents’ three-story house to avoid stairs, which was…Continue reading Telling Mom it’s time to move and other tricky care conversations
The nurse in the emergency room seemed annoyed: “Where do they normally put your father’s IV?” he huffed, as if my father got IV lines a lot. “I don’t know,” I shrugged. “He hasn’t had one while I’ve been his caregiver.” The doctor came in while the nurse was doing his thing and peppered me…Continue reading Paper: A simple tool for better care
Apparently, my father’s skin was a topic of conversation among his hospice team for how beautiful it was. Nature was certainly on his side but it also helped that I gave him collagen. Collagen is a protein found in skin, bones, connective tissue & elsewhere in the body. Beef tendon is a staple in some…Continue reading Using collagen and chlorophyll for health & treating bedsores