Inspiring wonderful places to grow up and grow old by fostering care communities and care economies for & by neighbors.
Malcolm Gladwell’s theory of cockpit culture suggests that Korean Air Flight 801 didn’t crash and kill hundreds of people because of poor planes or crew training, but hierarchy: In Korean culture, the theory goes, one complies with elders and superiors. When that means a junior pilot not questioning the call of a senior one, the…Continue reading Are self-managing teams the way to avert tragedy & scale home care?
This story is about coming alive, not bashing the government. In fact, I worked for the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services—at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and later in the Office of Inspector General (OIG)—and found that feds in my orbit seemed driven by what drove me: A deep and sincere…Continue reading Are we truly serious about healing and living long & healthy lives?
Last time, I said that my mother only does as well as I can care for her. It’s a kindness, then, for me as a caregiver—and you, if it applies—to care for myself by saying “no” judiciously. After too long of saying yes too much when caring for my father when he was alive, I…Continue reading I made caregiving miracles by saying no
In preparing to write this story, I listened to Jacqueline du Pré playing Elgar’s cello concerto to find the words to describe how that experience feels. I burst into tears during the first bar. Some of that had to do with the music taking me to a time when my father was alive, but it…Continue reading Our bodies will say no if we don’t
A trip for red lentils pushed me to learn to drive at age 36: Then a new resident of Georgia, it once took me 3+ hours to get to and from Whole Foods on MARTA (Metropolitan Atlanta “not so” Rapid Transit Authority) and once was enough. But I was a lucky one because even though…Continue reading How ice cream cones (or red lentils) can help you plan your future
Until my mother and I started chatting last summer with a woman at Los Tios Grill, I’d only known of Jimmy Buffett, who died recently, as a singer, not the proprietor of retirement communities inspired by his music and lifestyle. But the woman, a self-described “parrothead” (diehard Buffett fan), said that she was visiting from…Continue reading Margaritaville escapism, vertical village engagism or something else?
As a daughter, my mother is my mother. As a family caregiver, my mother is my customer / client: she gets services from me. As a village maker, neighbors are my primary customers. Or people who’ll “buy into” caring for folks nearby. The idea for Vertical Village Alliance grew directly from my childhood as an…Continue reading Making what’s missing to serve your “customers”
I told a friend that I’m ditching the phrase “care crisis,” which I picked up from someone else in the first place. That isn’t to say that all is well in the world of care, but that problems and solutions can’t occupy our brains at the same time. When we call something a crisis, we…Continue reading Care crisis or prosperity opportunities?
It was obvious once I heard it but, to my embarrassment, it hadn’t occurred to me before: When Black people were fighting to sit at the front of the bus, people with disabilities were fighting to get on the damned things. Fast forward many years from my “how didn’t I see that?” moment ’til now….Continue reading Working until death: a fate for many with disabilities
There’s a saying that goes, “If you want to take the island, burn the boats.” Attributed to different people, it means “if you’re determined to advance, eliminate your means of retreat.” Like when I quit my job vs. taking a sick leave of absence: the latter would have let me return easily if the going…Continue reading Making a minimum viable village